The Fish

Our pedi is Dr. Zoe Singer-Fishman...and she is FANTASTIC. We call her The Fish for short. She is easy to talk to, reassuring, proactive and really, really smart. She's also really, super funny. She's blunt and direct. And that's the stuff I love about her. She doesn't mince words and she tells it like it is...my kind of lady.

So we had The Newbie's 2 month appt yesterday and I figure...I can take both him and Boobah and it'll be fine. And it was fine. It was actually funny. But I did leave feeling a bit like I sprouted 50,000 gray hairs.

I got her snack/toy bag all packed up...because now, you see, not only do I carry a diaper bag but I also carry a separate, albeit small, cooler type lunch bag filled with pretzels, drinks, natural cheetos, fruit leather, and raisins. Did I say it was a small bag? But wait...it also has 2 or 3 books, a mini magnadoodle, paper and crayons, and some finger puppets.

So we get to the office and she makes a beeline for the toy area. It's a good toy area. They have wall mounted bead mazes and faux cars that you can pretend to drive. And lots of books. She also likes to take off down the hall towards the exam rooms. So while I'm checking in, she's doing her Tazmanian Devil routine all around the place. Oh and she's smiling and waving at everyone that will look at her. She really is TOO CUTE.

We get taken early, which is a blessing b/c our appt was for 145 and lord knows how she gets when her routine is affected and since she naps at 2...I was pushing it. We go in around 1 ish and we wait for a few minutes. In those few - and I do mean FEW minutes she seizes her opportunity to SEEK AND DESTROY! I mean SEEK AND MAKE A MESS! She opened every cupboard and drawer and before my very eyes - while I'm trying to undress The Boy - she starts pilfering through diapers, drapes, urine cups, plastic syringes, tongue depressors, and cotton swabs. Climbing on every chair in the exam room, under the exam table, on top of the exam table and behind the exam table. She also realized that she is just tall enough to reach the L shaped door handle and bolt out into the hallway. But while I'm undressing The Boy, I've cleverly got my foot pinned up against the door so she can't open it. BUT she can get it just so she can squeeze her pudgy baby fingers into the space between the door and frame enough for it to hurt.

So by now The Fish is with us and I'm trying to ask and answer questions and discuss The Boy's progress all the while Boobah is now rifling through my not to big but not to small cooler type bag. She is quite graciously offering snacks, drinks, toys and books to The Fish.

I barely remember anything about the talking part of the appt. But I do know that The Boy is 13/1 and 23-3/4. 61% and 64% respectively. I'm pleased.

And then there were the shots...Boobah saw them coming...knew they weren't for her...but cried anyways. She ran to me and buried her head in my lap and sobbed. I was also holding The Boy for this first and painful series of shots while he screamed. The sound was deafening. And the nurse was trying to explain something to me about if a fever starts, tylenol, pain, swelling...WHAT??? I couldn't hear shit. The crying was so loud I wouldn't have been able to hear a dumptruck driving through a nitroglycerine plant! But I've done this before so I know the drill.

The RNs leave the room and I start to pack up. Which was funny. I was just stuffing things, into my formerly perfectly Tetris-style packed bags, wherever they would fit. She's crying, he's crying - I'm sweating and practically crying myself. Ok - we're done...I have both bags over one shoulder, her on one hip and him in the carrier on the other arm. And the receptionist had the NERVE to ask me as I started moving towards the main door in a rush if I wanted to stop and make his next appointment!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! I muttered that I'd call when I got home and kept moving...into the torrential downpour.

Sigh...we made it to the car. Boobah worked well with me and stayed awake on the ride home and took a 2 hour nap when we got there.

I'm not a religious woman but....Halleluja and AMEN!!!